The Gay Marriage Controversy

*Originally published on 1/8/09




Gay marriage has been a hot button issue for years. With the passing of Prop 8 in California and similar laws being passed in other states, the gauntlet has been thrown down and both sides are putting up their dukes as the slug-fest between equality and tradition rages on.
I am really tempted to comment on how marriage really isn't all that grand. I mean, have you seen sitcoms? I don't see the appeal. If anything, you have the better end of the deal, but that's a debate for another day.

I, personally, support it in a secular sense. The sanctity that Christians are always talking about lies in the religious ceremony. My thinking is that a secular, but still legal, marriage would be a healthy compromise. The sacred union would remain intact while members of the gay community would be able to get legally married and enjoy the benefits that come with it. You can't really force the church to support it as that violates church and state. Many politicians say they support civil unions but not marriage. The problem with this is that a Civil Union is essentially a secular marriage only not using the word. At this point, people who oppose gay marriage are just clinging to the word, which is kind of anal.

My opinion aside I'm going to look at this from every angle I can. The way I see it, the gay debate boils down to two questions. One, is homosexuality a sin? and two, is homosexuality a choice? Let's break it down shall we.

Part 1: Yes, it is a sin

Gasp! Homosexuality is a sin? How dare you? You say? Relax I'm simply posing a hypothetical here. I'm no religious scholar, and God hasn't spoken to me personally so I can't say one way or the other that it is a sin. Some say that it's not natural, and from a procreative stance, yes it is. I mean a man and woman get together to make the babies, two members of the same sex can't do it. This may be the logic behind God's decision or it may be something else entirely, I don't know. But here's the thing, pssst gay people, straight people sin too. I'm not joking. It happens. Everybody sins at some point, it's part of being human. The good news is that God is a forgiving bloke. I know it seems abhorrent to suggest that you apologize for being gay but at the same time I'd say that apologizing for it beats spending an eternity in hell for it. Now if some uppity Christian tries to harass you and condemn you for your sins, just point out that they sin as well. There's even a quote for situations like this, "let he who is without sin cast the first stone", that's the Bible, so you can turn their own weapon against them. That won't solve the going to hell problem, but at least you'll be able to live peacefully in sin. In closing, I have to say that just because someone opposes gay marriage, it does not make them a bigot or a homophobe. Rather, I'd say that it makes them an idealist who believes that marriage is a sacred bond between a man and a woman.

Part 2: No it's not a sin

Back in the day, eating meat on a Friday was considered a sin. The church changed it, that tradition still holds during Lent, but the rest of the year meat is fair game at the end of the week. Maybe, the church will do the same thing with marriage. I know secular people hate the idea of bringing up Jesus, but I'm going to do it anyways. He was a pretty laid back person who was all about spreading a positive message. His whole love one another message fits perfectly with the gay community's desire to marry. They're not hurting anyone by getting married, so what's the problem? As for what God's will is, again I don't know. One could say that the church added those passages due to their own beliefs?

Part 3: It is a choice

This was the mentality I used to hold. Not in a bad way mind you. I just thought that people were given two choices, A and B, they decided to go with B. It's not the wrong choice, just a different one. If that's what they wanted to do, whatever works for em is fine by me. Now if it is a sin and a choice, than they really have a problem. If it's not a sin and this is the case than the issue is pretty much moot.

Part 4: It's not a choice.

This is the argument that many gay activists make. Nowadays, if you say being gay is a choice you are seen as narrow-minded and ignorant. It wasn't false logic like that that got me to change my mind. You see, I am an avid fan of meatball subs; I think they're ambrosia. Now, did I choose to love meatball subs? No, I tried them and found them delicious. There was no conscious effort on my part to lean one way or the other. That's just they way it was. I came to the conclusion that the same rule applies when it comes to falling in love with someone. In regards to it being a sin with this circumstance, why would God make you a certain way and then send you to hell for it? It makes no sense and is downright daffy.

Another argument often made is that if you allow homosexual marriage then all the polygamists will come out as will people who want to marry their dog. Laws are made on semantics. If you specify that marriage is a union between two, and only two, people of appropriate age than you have no problem. If you're going to edit the standards of marriage, I think you should also add a statute saying that you can't get married while drunk and any such instance will be immediately declared null and void. It will reduce the divorce rate and save tax money as well as time.

The gay marriage debate will probably go on for some time. What's important to remember is that both sides have valid arguments. It's not fair to dismiss, demonize, or belittle the other side simply because they don't agree with you. Ad hominem attacks like that aren't going to get us anywhere. The odds of everyone agreeing to one side or the other are slim, as such we can either meet each other halfway or agree to disagree.